“Of all the small nations of this earth, perhaps only the ancient Greeks surpass the Scots in their contribution to mankind” – Winston Churchill.
Churchill may not have been talking exclusively about Scottish cuisine, but his words are easily applied to the world of gastronomy. Scotland has a large number of particular (and sometimes peculiar) recipes, national dishes and general foodstuffs that are loved and revered the world over. Throughout France and Europe there is a constant demand for these tastes of Scotland and, whilst we are yet to establish a practicable way of delivering a perfectly deep-fried Mars bar, we do have a pure quality selection of Scottish favourites for your delectation.
Whilst there are certainly some Scots comestibles that have seem a bit weird (such as deep-fried pizza, well fired rolls or a piece & sauce) or simply sound a bit weird (cranachan, clapshot, rumbledethumps or festy cock), there are an equally large number of crowd-pleasers, family favourites and stone-cold must-haves that originate from north of Hadrian’s Wall. To help you bring a corner of Caledonia to your kitchen, here is a list of super Scottish things The Trading Post keeps in stock and a few suggestions for how you can make everyday ingredients mair magic. If you are not Scottish, why not expand your horizons and add some of these products to your next order?
Let’s start with Irn Bru – the bright orange fizzy pop that is apparently the lifeblood of many ex-pat Scots. It is apocryphally made “from girders,” arguably tastes like sunshine mixed with sweet adrenaline and almost unquestionably pairs well with any meal at any time of day. In terms of iconic drinks, we also sell the (even) more potent Buckfast wine which is strongly caffeinated and informally known as Cumbernauld Rocket Fuel (amongst other things). In terms of exciting Scottish foodstuffs, The Trading Post has so many options it’s easier to just list them in a fairly haphazard way: Scotch pies, Edinburgh gins, Brewdog beers, shortbread biscuits, Hall’s square sausage, Tunnock’s tea cakes, potato scones, a wide selection of Scottish oatcakes and Haggis, Neeps & Tatties ready meals. There are probably plenty more items that are Scottish, or identify as Scottish, but you’ll just have to check out our website.
If those ready-made Scottish snashters are insufficient to sate your desire for Scots specialities, here are a few tricks to add some Scottish zeal to your meals…
Eat pizza with chips. You can even serve your pizza on a bed of chips. It’s the kind of carb-overload that you shouldn’t love, but you will.
Batter and deep-fry EVERYTHING. The Mars bar was perhaps the first “unusual” ingredient to find fame as a deep-fried delicacy, but you’ll regularly find deep-fried Cadbury Crème eggs at Easter and deep-fried pizza year-round (a battered version is a “pizza crunch” whereas you can also try it unbattered). Apparently, battering and deep-frying Tunnock’s tea cakes is also a thing…
Put a pie in a roll. It’s super easy, carb-heavy (again) and fully delicious. You can even butter the roll beforehand to ensure you’re getting your full daily compliment of calories.
Make a giant fried breakfast, with black pudding, sausage (square if you like), bacon, eggs and baked beans then eat it… for dinner.
Put salt in your porridge. That’s it. Not wildly crazy, but unnecessarily savoury for some people. Actually, for some people just eating porridge (regardless of seasoning) is a typically Scottish endeavour.
Marinade chicken wings with Irn Bru. Not much more to say about that.
Finally, eat a salad cream sandwich (or “a piece and sauce” as it’s sometimes known). It’s a bit like having a sandwich spread sandwich, but without the chunks.
When people sing Scotland the Brave, they mean it.
